Intimacy
In this section, intimacy means
sharing cuddles, and, if both are willing, kisses.
Intimacy within a Devotional Friendship is the most deeply felt and meaningful part of a Devotional Friendship.
For many people not in a romantic relationship, the lack of cuddles is a deeper loss than the lack of sex. This is fairly obvious if you think about it. You can easily self pleasure yourself to provide some satisfaction to your sexual desires, but before and after you are alone with no-one to cuddle.
The need for cuddles has been recognized by the authors of cuddleparty.com This site talks about our need for cuddles, and the problems singles face in trying to enjoy a cuddle without things going further. This site presents the rules of cuddle parties, and has a FAQ which is very informative.
What I find most refreshing about this site is that it recognizes that for adults a meaningful cuddle can have a sexual component, and being aroused does not mean that things must go any further.
In their FAQ, on the question dealing with erections, they say:
The rules of a cuddle party include "1 - Pajamas stay on the whole time," and there used to be a rule "7 - no dry humping." (It is hard to reference sites - like my site - which keep getting updated!)
Enjoying a cuddle with a Devotional Friend is made much richer and more powerful when erotic energy is experienced and enjoyed as part of the cuddle. A wet Pleasure and a hard Desire can be a fun part of an enjoyable cuddle. Just like at a cuddle party, Devotional Sex enables a couple to enjoy a cuddle without it leading on to other sexual activity.
A cuddle party is usually an organized event with an entry charge. Not going any further than a cuddle is policed by the `Cuddle Lifeguards´, as well as expectation from others of what is appropriate behavior.
Devotional Friends are alone together when they enjoy a cuddle. Not going any further with Devotional Friends is `policed´ by the Princess. As a Knight has made a commitment to obey all his Princess's sexual and sensual commands (within his limits), the Princess only needs to let her Knight know that she wants something stopped and her Knight will obey. (If he does not, then the whole Princess Knight dynamic collapses, and any committed Princess would declare "game over".)
As Devotional Friends are alone together it is easy, if the Princess wishes, to also enjoy other aspects of a Devotional Friendship. A Princess may wish to start with some sensual pleasures, and then conclude the evening with a cuddle. She may enjoy some erotic fun either before or after a cuddle. And a cuddle can, only if the Princess chooses, be the start of some sexual activity.
For a bed cuddle that is not going to go any further I recommend that the couple undress but leave their underpants on. During the cuddle there should be no touching over (or under) the underpants.
My experience is that a Princess who wants to enjoy a cuddle but no-more is usually comfortable to be topless in bed. The Princess has full control over whether or not her Knight is allowed to hold or to kiss her breasts.
Of course a Princess can choose to keep a top on if she wishes (best not to wear a bra underneath), and she can use her Princess Power to ensure that her Knight does not touch her breasts over her top (unless she wants him to).
I have found that with a cuddle in bed during which the underpants stay on (and are never touched) it feels natural for us both for the Knight to be allowed to hold and kiss his Princess's breasts. Each Princess should decide what feels right for her.
A very long and erotic bed cuddle is very refreshing to experience. It is a great place to spend some time! Unfortunately we live in a world where this place is rarely reached by those not wanting to go all the way, and is too quickly passed by those who are about to be more sexually active.
So if you find a Devotional Friend, I highly recommend that you try a nice long bed cuddle.
For a new Devotee couple starting a romantic relationship, the bed cuddle while leaving underpants on might be as far as they go during their first night together. For Devotional Friends, they might enjoy a bed cuddle like this many times, but never go any further.
If both Devotional Friends are happy to go a bit further than just a cuddle, then it works well to both wear your underpants when you first get into bed so that you can enjoy just a cuddle for a while before moving on to other activities.
Mild petting is just touching the sexual parts over clothing. The next step is to allow a hand under the clothing.
If the Knight's hands start to wander where the Princess does not want them to go, she needs to be calmly assertive and say no. If she would like something, and he is behaving himself too much, she should let him know that it is OK to do the next step. Some simple communication ensures that both people fully enjoy the cuddle.
It helps the dynamic if it is the Princess who `suggests´ going a little further as this reinforces that she is in control. This also makes it feel more natural if she later uses her control to not do something. If things move forward by the Knight just trying something to see if he is told "no" or if it is allowed, then the dynamic starts to become the Knight seeing how far he can go. If the Knight does start to take the lead the Princess can regain control by having him stop, or even go back two steps. And if she liked what he started, she can then tell him to do it, but this time it is her in control.
Unfortunately many women have learned to not take the lead in sexual activity. So if a Princess would like to be petted, and her Knight is behaving too much, it might be difficult for her to tell him what she would like. One way around this is to talk and add a little tease. "Would you like it if I let you kiss my breasts? I'm thinking it might feel nice". When he replys that he would like to do this, she can either make him wait a little longer before she allows it, or say "OK, I will let you."
Men and women often differ in their preferred timing of any petting. A man likes to have his Desire touched fairly quickly (so a man who touches a women too early is sometimes just doing to her what he wants done to him). A woman often prefers lots of cuddle before she is touched (and so her delay in touching him is often because she does not want to be touched).
In the controlled environment of Devotional Friends enjoying a cuddle, the Princess is safe to touch her Knight fairly quickly if she wants to tease or please him. More is said about teasing a man under erotic fun here. She can use her Princess Power to ensure that he does not touch her until, or unless, she wants him to.
Even if a Princess never touches her Knight's Desire, he will always be wanting this to happen. While it is Knightly for him to sometimes take the lead by moving his hand slowly to a new place (always leaving plenty of opportunity for his Princess to say "no"), it is never Knightly for him to take her hand and place it on his Desire.
It is difficult to fully enjoy and appreciate your partner petting you if you are also petting them. As part of Devotional Sex slowing things down, and enabling each moment to be enjoyed, it is recommended that Princess Power be used so that most of the time only one person is touching while the other is enjoying being touched.
Within a Devotional Friendship petting need not be balanced - she might like his hands to wander without her ever touching him, or she may enjoy touching him but never let him touch her.
See Erotic Fun for more about the fun parts of petting (and more), and see Sexual Pleasures for when things get more serious.
To explore another part of a Devotional Friendship, click a link below:
Intimacy within a Devotional Friendship is the most deeply felt and meaningful part of a Devotional Friendship.
For many people not in a romantic relationship, the lack of cuddles is a deeper loss than the lack of sex. This is fairly obvious if you think about it. You can easily self pleasure yourself to provide some satisfaction to your sexual desires, but before and after you are alone with no-one to cuddle.
The need for cuddles has been recognized by the authors of cuddleparty.com This site talks about our need for cuddles, and the problems singles face in trying to enjoy a cuddle without things going further. This site presents the rules of cuddle parties, and has a FAQ which is very informative.
What I find most refreshing about this site is that it recognizes that for adults a meaningful cuddle can have a sexual component, and being aroused does not mean that things must go any further.
In their FAQ, on the question dealing with erections, they say:
"When
men get aroused, they sometimes get erections. Arousal is an inherent
part of being human. But somehow, somewhere, many of us began to
believe that we must act on this arousal whenever it showed up, as if
we may never have another chance to be horny again and we must strike
while the iron is hot, so to speak."
The rules of a cuddle party include "1 - Pajamas stay on the whole time," and there used to be a rule "7 - no dry humping." (It is hard to reference sites - like my site - which keep getting updated!)
Enjoying a cuddle with a Devotional Friend is made much richer and more powerful when erotic energy is experienced and enjoyed as part of the cuddle. A wet Pleasure and a hard Desire can be a fun part of an enjoyable cuddle. Just like at a cuddle party, Devotional Sex enables a couple to enjoy a cuddle without it leading on to other sexual activity.
A cuddle party is usually an organized event with an entry charge. Not going any further than a cuddle is policed by the `Cuddle Lifeguards´, as well as expectation from others of what is appropriate behavior.
Devotional Friends are alone together when they enjoy a cuddle. Not going any further with Devotional Friends is `policed´ by the Princess. As a Knight has made a commitment to obey all his Princess's sexual and sensual commands (within his limits), the Princess only needs to let her Knight know that she wants something stopped and her Knight will obey. (If he does not, then the whole Princess Knight dynamic collapses, and any committed Princess would declare "game over".)
As Devotional Friends are alone together it is easy, if the Princess wishes, to also enjoy other aspects of a Devotional Friendship. A Princess may wish to start with some sensual pleasures, and then conclude the evening with a cuddle. She may enjoy some erotic fun either before or after a cuddle. And a cuddle can, only if the Princess chooses, be the start of some sexual activity.
Cuddles in bed
Bed is the most comfortable place for a nice long cuddle. One of the joys of accepting that a cuddle can be erotic but need not lead on to other things is that a cuddle can now be enjoyed in bed. Going to bed no longer means that other things are expected to happen.For a bed cuddle that is not going to go any further I recommend that the couple undress but leave their underpants on. During the cuddle there should be no touching over (or under) the underpants.
My experience is that a Princess who wants to enjoy a cuddle but no-more is usually comfortable to be topless in bed. The Princess has full control over whether or not her Knight is allowed to hold or to kiss her breasts.
Of course a Princess can choose to keep a top on if she wishes (best not to wear a bra underneath), and she can use her Princess Power to ensure that her Knight does not touch her breasts over her top (unless she wants him to).
I have found that with a cuddle in bed during which the underpants stay on (and are never touched) it feels natural for us both for the Knight to be allowed to hold and kiss his Princess's breasts. Each Princess should decide what feels right for her.
A very long and erotic bed cuddle is very refreshing to experience. It is a great place to spend some time! Unfortunately we live in a world where this place is rarely reached by those not wanting to go all the way, and is too quickly passed by those who are about to be more sexually active.
So if you find a Devotional Friend, I highly recommend that you try a nice long bed cuddle.
For a new Devotee couple starting a romantic relationship, the bed cuddle while leaving underpants on might be as far as they go during their first night together. For Devotional Friends, they might enjoy a bed cuddle like this many times, but never go any further.
If both Devotional Friends are happy to go a bit further than just a cuddle, then it works well to both wear your underpants when you first get into bed so that you can enjoy just a cuddle for a while before moving on to other activities.
Going just a little further
Some petting may be part of the cuddle. Of course a Princess can decide not to allow any petting.Mild petting is just touching the sexual parts over clothing. The next step is to allow a hand under the clothing.
If the Knight's hands start to wander where the Princess does not want them to go, she needs to be calmly assertive and say no. If she would like something, and he is behaving himself too much, she should let him know that it is OK to do the next step. Some simple communication ensures that both people fully enjoy the cuddle.
It helps the dynamic if it is the Princess who `suggests´ going a little further as this reinforces that she is in control. This also makes it feel more natural if she later uses her control to not do something. If things move forward by the Knight just trying something to see if he is told "no" or if it is allowed, then the dynamic starts to become the Knight seeing how far he can go. If the Knight does start to take the lead the Princess can regain control by having him stop, or even go back two steps. And if she liked what he started, she can then tell him to do it, but this time it is her in control.
Unfortunately many women have learned to not take the lead in sexual activity. So if a Princess would like to be petted, and her Knight is behaving too much, it might be difficult for her to tell him what she would like. One way around this is to talk and add a little tease. "Would you like it if I let you kiss my breasts? I'm thinking it might feel nice". When he replys that he would like to do this, she can either make him wait a little longer before she allows it, or say "OK, I will let you."
Men and women often differ in their preferred timing of any petting. A man likes to have his Desire touched fairly quickly (so a man who touches a women too early is sometimes just doing to her what he wants done to him). A woman often prefers lots of cuddle before she is touched (and so her delay in touching him is often because she does not want to be touched).
In the controlled environment of Devotional Friends enjoying a cuddle, the Princess is safe to touch her Knight fairly quickly if she wants to tease or please him. More is said about teasing a man under erotic fun here. She can use her Princess Power to ensure that he does not touch her until, or unless, she wants him to.
Even if a Princess never touches her Knight's Desire, he will always be wanting this to happen. While it is Knightly for him to sometimes take the lead by moving his hand slowly to a new place (always leaving plenty of opportunity for his Princess to say "no"), it is never Knightly for him to take her hand and place it on his Desire.
It is difficult to fully enjoy and appreciate your partner petting you if you are also petting them. As part of Devotional Sex slowing things down, and enabling each moment to be enjoyed, it is recommended that Princess Power be used so that most of the time only one person is touching while the other is enjoying being touched.
Within a Devotional Friendship petting need not be balanced - she might like his hands to wander without her ever touching him, or she may enjoy touching him but never let him touch her.
See Erotic Fun for more about the fun parts of petting (and more), and see Sexual Pleasures for when things get more serious.
To explore another part of a Devotional Friendship, click a link below:
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