Comparing Devotional Sex with other techniques

This page compares and contrasts Devotional Sex with the multi-orgasmic man technique, Tantra, Karezza, Female Led Relationships, and BDSM.

As well as pointing out the differences between Devotional Sex and the other techniques, the comparisons below show that Devotional Sex also has things in common with the each of the other techniques.

There is no `best´ technique, but there is probably a best technique for you and your partner at this time. So if the following leads you away from this site to explore another technique, I'll be pleased I will have helped you along your journey.

As Devotional Sex includes components of many of the other techniques, trying Devotional Sex is a great way to get a mild taste of all the other techniques at the one time. So I hope you choose to explore Devotional Sex further.

Taoist multi-orgasmic man cf Devotional Sex

The multi-orgasmic man technique comes from Taoist practices and is often practiced as part of Tao. Devotional Sex does not include any other Taoist practices.

With both real Tao and Devotional Sex the man does not ejaculate most times he has sexual activity. With Devotional Sex the man will usually ejaculate more often than with real Tao.

With Tao the man uses techniques to fully calm his erotic energy during non-sexual times. With Devotional Sex the Knight deliberately does not fully calm his erotic energy, and it is this excess energy which keeps him always keen to do something with his Princess - be it just give her a foot massage or something more sexual.

I suspect that with real Tao when the man is in bed with his partner on a night or morning that has no sexual activity, the man would not get an erection. With the higher energy of Devotional Sex it is common for the Knight to get an erection when just cuddling his Princess.

The multi-orgasmic man technique enables a man to have multiple-orgasms without ejaculating. For Devotional Sex to work the Knight must calm his erotic energy enough for him to be easily `managed´ by his Princess - and the process of learning to orgasm without ejaculating enables this. Getting to the final step of being able to orgasm without ejaculating is not essential to Devotional Sex, but having almost got there I would encourage all Knights to learn to Crest.

There is no erotic power dynamic with Tao, and thus what sexual activity happens is negotiated normally. With Devotional Sex there is a power dynamic where the Knight obeys all sensual and sexual commands of his Princess. So she decides when sex will happen, and how, and when things will be just a cuddle. This power dynamic, combined with the higher erotic energy of the Knight, enables lots of the special activities which are part of Devotional Sex.

With Tao the man decides when he will ejaculate. With Devotional Sex it is the Princess who decides.

Both Tao and Devotional Sex are easy for a man to apply when he first dates a new partner.

Hence those who practice the multi-orgasmic man technique in the Taoist way will have a very different sex life from couples who practice Devotional Sex.

More is said about the differences between Tao and Devotional Sex in Chapter 3 here, and you can ask questions and discuss these differences in the Devotional Sex Forum here.

Tantra cf Devotional Sex

(This section will be written soon.)

Karezza cf Devotional Sex

Karezza means different things to different people. Karezza can be just that the male does not ejaculate during intercourse. But many take it much further and define it as "a gentle, affectionate form of intercourse in which orgasm is not the goal, and ideally does not occur in either partner while making love," and this then sets up a sexual dynamic which makes Karezza a sexual philosophy in its own right.

It is this expanded view of Karezza (as presented at the Reunitiing: Healing with Sexual Relationships website) which I compare with Devotional Sex.

With both Karezza and Devotional Sex (and Tantra) the focus during intercourse is on connection and enjoying the moment rather than an animal-like rush to reach orgasm.

Karezza has the ideal of neither partner having an orgasm because, according to Karezza, orgasms do not promote bonding and they can even make the relationship worse. With Devotional Sex orgasms are good. A Princess can have an orgasm whenever she wishes (either through Joy or the Ritual command). A Knight will usually not ejaculate when he has sex, but he will sometimes enjoy multiple orgasms without ejaculating. And when a Princess has her Knight ejaculate this is very much enjoyed by both.

Karezza does not encourage "standard foreplay" either on its own or before intercourse. With Devotional Sex a session which consists of only one or more foreplay activities is very common, and when intercourse is included, foreplay can happen before or even after intercourse (for example, a Princess can have her Knight stop intercourse and have him give her oral sex).

Karezza has the view that sexual arousal is bad because the couple will be unable to refrain from continuing till orgasm. Devotional Sex includes many times of enjoying sexual arousal that does not end with an orgasm.

Both Karezza and Devotional Sex are lifestyle techniques (they not only effect all sexual activity, but set what happens on days when there is no full sexual activity).

With Karezza there are lots of bonding activities during which the aim is for neither person to become sexually aroused. Within Devotional Sex the man having an erection is always a good thing, and it is common for a Devotee couple to enjoy a cuddle which goes no further even though the Knight is aroused. In fact one of the main bonding activities within Devotional Sex is the Devotional Cuddle (a cuddle where the Princess holds her Knight's erection).

With Karezza the female helps her partner minimize his arousal, whilst with Devotional Sex a Princess has fun encouraging and enjoying her partner's arousal.

Hence, compared to not practicing any advanced sexual technique, a man who practices Karezza will have far fewer erections, whilst a man practicing Devotional Sex will have many more. And whilst Karezza minimizes times of female arousal, a Devotional Sex Princess will enjoy more times or arousal, more sexual activity, and many more orgasms.

Karezza's main aim is to "keep lovers in balance and sustain the harmony of their unions" and to avoid "the curse of sexual stimulation leading to desensitization and discontent". So whilst Karezza is very high on connection, sex is minimized. With Devotional Sex (like Tantra) the aim is to enjoy more and better sex (as well as increasing connection).

While Tantra often creates connection through specified techniques and exercises (eg Tantra often focuses on breathing), both Karezza and Devotional Sex achieve connection as part of living the technique.

Karezza has an emphasis on keeping a monogamous couple together. Devotional Sex also increases and maintains connection between a couple, but, for those wanting to explore, Devotional sex also provides a new way of enabling activities with others. And for those not in a relationship, Devotional Sex enables and encourages activities with friends.

Karezza does not have an erotic power dynamic, and thus the couple need to negotiate activities in the normal way. With the Princess Powerof Devotional Sex it becomes very easy for a Princess to be relaxed (and not feeling sexual) whilst enjoying a cuddle with her aroused Knight. Many of the fun parts of Devotional Sex arise from the Princess using her power. So many of the fun parts of Devotional Sex will not happen with Karezza.

Though a man can easily practice Devotional Sex with a new date, I think it would be very difficult for a man to introduce a new date to Karezza, and even harder for a women to introduce it to her new date.

Karezza and Devotional Sex share the desire to use sex for connection, and both have the male not ejaculating most times the couple have intercourse. But, as seen above, the two techniques also have many significant differences.

Couples who practice Devotional Sex can choose to do this with a Karezza flavor.

And I'm sure that couples who are interested in both Karezza and Devotional Sex may be able to find a half-way point, which though it won't be real Karezza, and it won't be full Devotional Sex, may be just right for them.

Much more is said about the differences between Karezza and Devotional Sex in my review of the Reuniting website, and you can ask questions and discuss these differences in the Devotional Sex Forum here.

Female Led Relationship cf Devotional Sex

(This section will be written soon.)

BDSM cf Devotional Sex

(This section will be written soon.)

Devotional Sex really is new and different

Devotional Sex differs from all the other techniques, thus it really is something new!

(This section will be written soon.)

Continue to Why `devotional´ and `sex´

More about Devotional Sex